On the Couch with Jasminda

street mobile phone

 

Do you have a pressing problem, annoying anxiety or community conundrum? Jasminda Featherlight, our resident roving Agony Aunt, is here to help. Jasminda will be responding to questions from our FOUR News Of The Area papers on a rotating basis. Send your concerns to Jasminda care of [email protected] and include your title, initials and suburb.

Dear Jasminda,

In the past week I have had three people bump into me because they are on their mobile phones with their heads down while walking. It is becoming a hazard to walk along a path or a supermarket aisle these days.

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Mrs ND, Raymond Terrace

Dear Mrs ND,

There are so many hazards out there. Paths are loaded with dogs on extendable leads, people dawdling in their activewear, cyclists with bells that scare the bejesus out of us, nannas on motor scooters, stray toddlers, yogis practising mindfulness, roller skating enthusiasts, teenagers carrying hotted-up sound systems on their shoulders, and various other combinations that are destined to end in a major collision.

Supermarket aisles are just as bad. You have shop assistants stacking shelves, merchandisers doing stock rotation, toddlers lying on the ground in full tantrum mode, mothers’ groups having a weekly meeting (their prams creating an impenetrable barricade), unidentified liquid spills, sulking husbands, frazzled shoppers, trolleys that only veer in one direction due to dodgy wheels, and on it goes.

Now, add to the mix the ever-growing number of individuals who have their heads permanently bowed, as though praying to their Smartphones, and every outing is a catastrophe.

You can try clapping very loudly before the collision takes place. From experience this works quite well, even though people will look at you as though you are a bit of a loony. Or else walk and shop in the early hours, because you can bet that these poor, misguided phone addicts will be getting some shut-eye to soothe their damaged retinas.

Carpe diem,
Jasminda

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